Something To Think About

“You can’t
change your
life by doing
the same things
every day.”
~Cara Alwill Leyba

Just the other day I finally got my Style Your Mind workbook written by Cara Alwill Leyba. This was the first quote in the book and it is crazy how much I have resonated with it. Because in reality unless you change something that you are doing or have been doing for a long time nothing in your life will be any different. You can wish and wish that things will be different or better but unless you put in some of the work nothing is going to change. It all really depends on you and how much you want something.

The past couple of years I have done a lot of studying about The Secret and the power of your mind. I know a lot of people think that it just seems stupid to just sit and think about all of the things that you want in life and hope that the universe will bring them to you and that everything in your life will be much better. Well, only part of that is true. You have to get clear about what you want. You have to train your mind to stop complaining all the time and seeing all of the negative around you all the time. Now, I’m not saying that having a bad day or feeling some negative feelings are bad, it is just when you are so focused on those negative feelings every day that they seem to take over every area of your life. You have to manage those thoughts and manage your decisions about things. Then really start to work hard for what you want.

I decided to buy the book Stye Your Mind because recently I have felt stuck. Just not knowing where to turn. I am a planner and I like to have goals that I can set and work toward. However, I have never been so undecided about which way I want my life to go. I think that I am finally at a point in my life where I have free range to kind of do what ever I really want. Before I finished high school then went to college which was what everyone was doing. Then I got a job (that I didn’t like) in order to pay my bills and my student loans. So, really, everything that I have done before this were things that I had to do and not necessarily things that I wanted to do in order to change my life.

Now that I am staying at home to raise our son I have time to think about what I would like to try and do with my life. Even if it just starts out as something on the side for now until he is in school. However, there are so many different things that interest me that it is hard to set specific goals to try and achieve something. Then you throw into the mix trying to balance what I want with being a mom and I am at a loss as to which way to go.

I have only started this workbook, however, I am finding it to be very unique and very much something that I need in my life right now. I am a firm believer that I know what I need to do it is just a matter of almost talking it out and finding my own answer within me. Cara is a master life coach and bestselling author. I started following her through her blog The Champagne Diet and now I follow her on social media and listen to her podcasts. This workbook that she has created is full of questions. Questions that make you think about the different areas of your life and it has definitely made me see things differently already. I am realizing different things that I have been doing that have been blocking me from what I really want. I have realized different things about my life and what I thought I really wanted has kind of changed a bit.

I am excited to finish this workbook and to see what other discoveries and aha moments I have. If you are someone like me that has been to talk with a therapist and they just don’t seem to be the right thing to help you figure out stuff in your life, I recommend trying out this book and seeing if you can make some discoveries as well!

When Did We Become So Afraid of Going Outside?

I have started to notice more and more lately that it seems as though I am the only mom outside with my kid. Especially now that it is summertime, I always make sure to take Ray outside at least once a day. Even if it is just for 15 minutes or so. I’m not sure if it is because I have such an active little boy that staying cooped up inside a house with him for too long is not a good thing or if I am realizing how much better we both feel after we have been outside for a little while.

Being outside is good for kids. I remember in the summertime we were always outside. That was our playtime and we loved it. I remember running around barefoot in the yard playing with my brother and sister. I remember how much I loved to lay on my back in the grass and watch the clouds in the afternoon shade. Kids today do not seem to get to really enjoy nature and everything it teaches them. We are always so busy that the thought of going outside to just spend sometime playing and not being stimulated by some sort of electronic device is just an awful thought. If we are not willing to relax and unplug for a moment then how do we expect our kids to do the same?

And another thing, it really is ok for your kids to get dirty. I mean with actual dirt! My son loves being outside so much that he likes to just sit out in the dirt in the driveway and dig up rocks. Just yesterday he sat out in the drive with his little dump truck and was weeding! I know a lot of you think about what you are supposed to do when they are playing outside. Especially if you are making an effort to not be on your phone and try to be in the moment just enjoying the quite peacefulness of the outdoors. I say do what I do, sit right down with them in the dirt and help them out. They think that it is great that you are spending time with them and you can really see them learning new things about the world around them.

Sometimes, I like to just sit back and take in everything around me. This is my time to really observe and see how Ray interacts with the things around him. This is also my time that I kind of just meditate on how lucky I am and be thankful for everything around me. When we are always so busy to move onto the next thing and to always be going, going, going it is hard to sit and take in the moment. I will say that this is something that I definitely have to work at. But it is nice. The only reason I have my phone on me is really to just take pictures of some of the perfect moments.

I know some of you are thinking that this is great and all for summertime but what happens when it is too hot outside? Or when it starts to get colder and snows? Well I will definitely tell you that I never used to be a very big outdoor person. Unless it came to laying out and getting a tan. However, since having Ray I am now going outside at least once a day.

On the days that it gets really hot outside, I plan my days for going outside early in the morning usually before 10am and then we go back outside after dinner. These are the days where we have an early dinner and he is able to play before he gets a bath. In the spring and summer if it is raining we still go outside in the rain. Trust me, your kids are not going to melt. Put them in their swimsuit and let them play in the puddles. They love it and as long as it is not too cold out you don’t have to worry.

On days when it is cold out and when there is snow, I try to plan going outside at least once. When there is snow we go outside and Ray usually plays while I shovel the drive. We even have a little shovel for him because he likes to help. These are the days where we cannot be outside for too long and you really have to watch to make sure they are not getting too cold. But it really does them some good to get the fresh air (it does you some good too trust me). A lot of times I try to plan going out late in the morning before lunch or early in the afternoon when it is usually the warmest. As long as you both bundle up you will be fine. I have also been known to bundle Ray up and let him play with his toys in the garage in the winter. We have a little heater for out there and as long as he keeps his hat and gloves on we stay out there for quite a while.

Overall we cannot be afraid to let our kids go outside. As long as we are mindful and are spending our time out with them they will be fine. And if they eat a little dirt or even part of a worm (Ray definitely did this once when we were weeding the flowers 😝) they will be fine. Sometimes going outside is just what all of us need.